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The secret to making a relationship last. ~ Dana + Dwayne {us}

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The sun is setting on a gorgeous Philadelphia spring day and as the last of the rays ping off of the top of the wall surrounding the roof deck lounge that Dana & Dwayne are snuggling up at, we chat for a moment about relationships and people.  We have finished our {us} session and now as the sun sets we talk for a few moments about how every single person who you make contact with in your life has a very distinctive personality and way of engaging socially.  Some people are quiet and introverted yet bloom when you shower them with your affection, humor and love.  Others are outgoing and extroverted and touch everyone in their path with their aura.

I look at Dwayne and he is smiling that smile towards Dana that I have seen for the past several hours.  He cracks a joke and she bursts out laughing, it is a scene that I have seen many times today.  He tells me that when he is with Dana, he just wants to make her happy, to put a smile on her face.  It’s a job he takes very seriously and I can see that.  He says that her smile is something he loves to see and that making her feel good makes him feel good…

I firmly believe that some of the biggest challenges in entering into and maintaining a relationship comes when you go in search of finding someone or something that can make you feel a certain way.  Many times in my past when something would come to an end I would ask myself what it was that I lacked.  Was I not smart enough, pretty enough, tall enough, thin enough, fun enough, quiet enough?  I’m sure we all have toiled over such things from time to time.  As my experiences have molded my opinions I discovered the secret to making any kind of relationship last.   It’s very simple but all parties have to be on board.  Whether it is a friendship, family or love interest this works!!!

When you seek a relationship to validate yourself and search for someone to fill a void or complete you, you aren’t bringing your best self.  The only sure fire way to make a relationship last is if you treat that connection as a place that you come to GIVE and not a place that you go to TAKE.  It really is that simple.  If everyone would just engage with others and give more of themselves and anyone who receives would just give back, well, this world we call home would be a better home.

Too often we may give way too much energy to people and situations that only depletes our Happy, ya know?  Don’t feed those relationships, feed the relationships that fuel you.

Thank you to Dana & Dwayne for fueling each other and for making a space for each other, for giving!  You make it easy for me to stand in front of you, push a button and know the realness of your giggles, thoughts and tears.

PS… It doesn’t hurt when you look so fierce together, especially in that dress Dana!

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